Thursday, February 25, 2010

3 things I never thought I'd say....but said tonight.

-"Should I hold on to this 6 yards of green plaid John Deere fabric or throw it away?"

-"This McSnack Wrap is delectable."

-"Poor Boner."

Monday, February 22, 2010

Inefficient Laziness....

After dinner tonight, I went into the kitchen to clean up after myself, and the dirty frying pan, rice cooker, plate, glass, cutting board, and utensils were too much for me to fathom cleaning at that moment. Even worse, the dishwasher was not an option, as it was already running. I had no choice but to wash them BY HAND. Ugh. This is one of those things my friend Vrej refers to as one of my "first world problems". And he's totally right. But I still wasn't going to wash my dishes.

So I head back upstairs for a while and finish a couple other chores that didn't seem so "difficult". I padded down the stairs about an hour later to find that the dishes HAD NOT CLEANED THEMSELVES. After the shock wore off, I noticed the dishwasher had finished running. I then had the brilliant idea that if I just emptied the dishwasher, I could pop my dishes in there, and avoid washing them altogether. Genius. Except for this: the amount of time I spent emptying the dishwasher, putting it's contents in their correct spots, followed by rinsing my dirty (and now dried up) dishes and placing them in took more time than if I'd just washed them by hand in the first place.

But hey, I avoided the hassle of HAVING TO GRAB THE DISH SOAP. My name is Jen, and I excel at inefficient laziness. Score one for me.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Attention: Cookies

An open letter to the cookies on my kitchen counter:

Dear "Chocolate Wows",

Stop torturing me. I'm working out. I'm eating well. And yet I ended up in your trance for the third day in a row. Leave me alone.

Also, your name is retarded.

Signed,
Jen