Thursday, July 24, 2008

Bloggers in my neighborhood....

Saw this on another blog, and I thought it might be fun...while my blog list is still fairly short, it's not the size that matters, people. :)

Someone on my blogroll is an amazing mother of THREE seriously cute babies. She is one of the funniest, wisest people I know, and is not afraid to tell it like it is. She and her husband are some of my favorite people, and she's the reason I started my own blog in the first place.

Someone on my blogroll is the grande dame of the blogging world. No, she actually IS.

Someone on my blogroll is not a real person, but he entertains the hell out of me more than any other fictional beet farmer working at a mid-range paper supply company ever could.

Someone on my blogroll is the family of a little boy in Canada who has more courage than I could ever hope for. He's an inspiration, for sure.

Someone on my blog roll is my favorite musician, who is also an incredibly entertaining blog writer.

Someone on my blogroll is my favorite musician who has a separate blog for a Japanese magazine. Doesn't everyone?

Someone on my blogroll was in Oklahoma! with me last summer, and is currently doing missionary work in South Africa for a year. She's such a little go-getter!

Someone on my blogroll has their fingers on the pulse of the white man.

Someone on my blogroll loves her beautiful family of 11, and if we ever met in real life, I know we would be friends.

Totally off topic, but all this repeated typing of the word "blogroll" just makes me want a lobster roll. But since I don't live in Boston anymore, I'm not bloody likely to find one for lunch today. I'll just pretend my veggie corn dogs from Trader Joe's in the breakroom freezer are the same thing. Eff.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

The Dreaded Dating Update....

It's easier for me to be funny. It always has been. It's easy for me to write about truck balls, Jessie Spano, and Ted Kennedy's unflattering photos, but when it comes down to anything that's serious or might make me the slightest bit vulnerable, it becomes difficult for me to eloquently express it. Especially in this somewhat public forum.

This is the post I've been meaning to write for a while. The tag line for my blog says that this blog was created to be "A look at everyday life, DATING, and love of cheese through the eyes of Jen." The original focus of this blog was going to document my dating misadventures, because there have been SO MANY of them. But then, the absurdity of everyday life just kept happening before my eyes, and that became what my posts shifted towards. And can you blame me?! There's just so much ridiculousness out there to talk about!

There's a reason why I haven't written a post about my dating status in a while. Mostly, because there's nothing to share. Nothing has changed. I like a guy, we go out, we have a great time. Fully expect a 2nd date, and nothing comes of it. I actually just went out with a really nice guy last night, and I'm currently hoping for date #2. I think it might actually happen. But given my wretched track record, I'm just operating under 'cautious optimism' right now.

Simply put, I'm embarrassed. Embarrassed to admit that almost every guy I've gone out with in the last year (actually, 3 years) seems to end up on the back of a milk carton after date number one. Embarrassed that I keep failing and don't know why. I'm also afraid that's it's not actually these guys, but it's me, something I'm doing or putting out there. Afraid that everyone around me sees the reason why it keeps happening, but they want to spare my feelings and don't want to tell me what I'm doing wrong. Afraid I keep repeating a pattern of something unattractive or undesirable on these dates that I'm not detecting about myself. It pisses me off, because I pride myself on being self-aware, and right now I can't get a handle on what I'm doing incorrectly.

Definition of insanity: Doing the same thing over and over, expecting a different result. Believe me, I wish I could stop this dating insanity. If I knew how to get that different result, I would. I go on a date with a guy...I'm funny, I'm easy to talk to, I'm MYSELF. And that's not going to change. So how do I get that different result without changing ME? And I know, I know...

"It's not you, it's him."

"He's just not that into you." (and yes, I've read that book)

Both valid points. And most of the time, I truly believe these theories. However, when EVERY date turns out the same way, I can't help but start to look inward, as I'M the one constant in this dating experiment, and the guys are the ever-changing variables. But most of the time, I try to take it in stride and stay positive. Tonight is just a needed venting session that's been building up. I don't mean to sound whiny, because I hate whiners. I don't want this post to come off as me throwing myself a pity party, and being just another woman complaining about men. There ARE great guys out there. I see examples of them EVERY day in my brother, my friends, husbands/boyfriends of friends...and that gives me hope. I don't subscribe to the notion of "all the good ones are taken". That's crap. What kind of horrible world would we live in if EVERY good guy of our 6 billion on Earth was already taken? I don't buy it. I know there's a reason God has decided to hold off on bringing someone to me, so it's just a practice in patience. And I BLOW at patience sometimes, but I'm trying to get better at it.

There are tons of people out there with similar gripes about the mystery of dating. I know I'm not the only one, and I take comfort in those stories. I continue going out. I continue trying. I continue to have faith. I HAVE TO. Otherwise, that's when we permanently turn bitter and cynical towards love. And the thought of that annoys me much more than the pile of dudes that haven't called back.

In a nutshell, bitter ain't gonna be happening to Yen, bitches.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Why do I....?

Q: Why do I stay up until 4am hanging out with friends after I'd done a 12 hour wedding workday today?

A: Because my friends entertain the hell out of me, even when I feel like a zombie.

Q: Why is it that as I'm pulling into my driveway after said late night, I still want to spend an extra 3 minutes in my car so I can finish listening to Chaka Khan's "Ain't Nobody" on the radio, even though I'm so tired that I almost fell asleep behind the wheel?

A: Because I'm awesome. And so is Chaka.

Q: Why am I blogging about it?

A: See previous answer. If you guessed "Because Jen is effing crazy," you'd be mistaken.


Thursday, July 17, 2008

Public Service Annoucements CAN be entertaining!

I postings have been sparse lately. I promise I will get better once this move is over...I've found that inspiration is slow to come when life is stressful. Aack! But I'll take moving and stress over calm and remaining in this apartment! So to tide you over until a proper post can be written, I thought I'd give you this delectable tidbit of awesome.

Please be careful with the volume if you're at work, or if there are young, impressionable ears around....

My, my...Schoolhouse Rock has come a long way since I was wee.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Here's why I love John Mayer.

As you can see on my list of favorite blogs on the right side of the screen, I'm a big reader of both of John Mayer's blogs. I love the way he's SO smart, SO funny, and has a REAL perspective on life that hasn't left him in the wake of his huge success. His most recent entry really struck a chord with me (no musical pun intended). It's about his meeting a 4 year old in Canada named Isaac, who is arguably John's biggest fan. This kid definitely has some special challenges...he suffers from MPS VI. I'd never heard of it. Here's your homework: go read John's post here. Just make sure you come back and read the rest of my post. Don't go off and callously ditch me for John permanently. :)

Done? Ok....

I makes me happy that someone as big as John takes time for kids like Isaac. Whether or not you're a fan of his music, he's getting it right, and using his celebrity for good. And as much as I do LOVE his music (as anyone that knows me can tell you), I'm just as big a fan of John Mayer the person as I am of John Mayer the musician. He's not doing this because it will give him good press, he does it because it's the right thing to do. Which is a lot more than I can say for most of young Hollywood today. (Wow, I totally just channeled my late Grandmother with that last sentence) I'm sure tomorrow's celebrity gossip pics will show John with Jennifer Aniston at the supermarket buying SmartWater (Stars....they're just like us! Breaking news!), without even a mention of the good he's done to bring visibility to this little family.

I've added the blog for The Isaac Foundation to my favorite blogs on the right. The purpose of them starting this foundation is to raise awareness and eventually find a cure for this little known, yet debilitating disease Isaac is suffering from. I'm hoping this post will help the goal of raising awareness in a very small way. Please take a minute to visit their blog and website. For all my fellow blog-lovers out there, I know you'll be hooked on Isaac and his story immediately. I think the blog is written by his parents, and there is one particular entry that gives a touching account of Isaac's meeting with John from their perspective. And it's all being written by his Dad in a hospital waiting room while little Isaac is in surgery. It made me cry. I don't have kids yet, but I'm sure if you're a parent, their story will resonate even more with you.

My thoughts and prayers go out to Isaac and his family, and my thanks go to John Mayer for introducing us to this brave little dude. It's great to know there's good being done in the world. And if that makes me sound like Pollyanna, then so be it. I've got your effing Glad Game right here. Suck it.

Things I'm glad about today:
1. I got a lot done at work today...I felt more productive than I have in a while
2. Had a good workout
3. I have a great family
4. I have amazing friends
5. My dinner RULED...chicken, squash, and eggplant stir fry with black pepper sauce from Trader Joe's...YUM.
6. I'm moving into a beautiful condo in 2 short weeks! (That's right...I'm moving out! But that's a post for another day...)
7. I'm moving.
8. I'm MOVING.
9. I'M MOVING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
10. Cheese

I do promise to come off the lithium for the next post, and be back to my ranty ol' self.

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Dodgers, VD, and Kiwis...OH MY!!!

I HAVE to do a new post. I can't stand to see truck nuts every time I open my blog. So I'm sure you're sick of it too.

Let's remedy that, shall we? Here's a few pictures from various events of the last week....

My two VERY favorite things about LA in summertime are Dodger games and going to the Hollywood Bowl. If you live in LA and haven't been to the Bowl, you're missing out. Marin and I went to our first Bowl show of this summer on July 2. Imagine our elation knowing the theme for the whole 4th of July weekend was celebrating the Dodgers' 50th year being in LA. We were in HEAVEN. They played scores from various famous baseball movies (i.e. Field of Dreams, the Natural), and played several pieces from American composers. Then there was a HUGE fireworks show afterwards. What a great way to kick off the holiday weekend! This is a picture taken while Tommy Lasorda was leading the whole crowd in "Take Me Out to the Ballgame". If everyone had something in their lives that they loved as much as Tommy Lasorda loves those Dodgers, the world would be the better for it.
On Sunday, I headed down to Orange County to hang with Sara and Ro. We played cards, watched Sex and the City, played with makeup, and went to dinner. We were having such a girly day, that I'm sure any man daring to come within 30 feet of her apartment started to inexplicably grow breasts, cry at Steel Magnolias, and had the urge to adopt 5 cats.

I love these girls so stinking much, and I wish I could see them more. Before we left for dinner, I felt the need to add accessories. And so I added every one I could get my hands on.

And no, I don't wear glasses. I actually have freakishly good vision, and had to remove Sara's glasses shortly after this picture was taken, because I swear I was about to have a seizure.

On our walk back from dinner, we came upon this awesome piece of American automotive craftsmanship. Careful kids, wear protection. You are entering...the VD zone.

How genius...a one-stop shop for your syphilis, chlamydia, AND herpes needs! I half expected to find a mattress in the back of this van. In fact, I actually peered in the window to make sure no one was sleeping (or "sleeping") in there before I started climbing on it. The coast was clear, so ride the bumper I did! Of course, because of this careless behavior, I'll now have to go get tested at the free clinic.

Last night, Ro, Sara, and I headed down to Largo at the Coronet in LA to celebrate Sara's birthday. Bic Runga (singer/songwriter from New Zealand) was performing, and she was rumored to be having her fellow Kiwi's, Flight of the Conchords, as her special guest. Turns out it was true, so we were all stoked, ESPECIALLY the birthday girl! Of course, it was a GREAT show. Here is Sara before the show, laughing at her birthday cake at PF Chang's. Apparently she thinks desserts are quite humorous....

Of course, you all know about my love of Will Ferrell. So naturally, Stepbrothers is the most anticipated movie of my summer. After being disappointed by Semi-Pro, I'm really rooting for this one to be good. On our walk to Largo after dinner, Ro and I came upon this poster, and we couldn't resist. I mean, could YOU??? Wait, you could? Oh...that's cool. No...yeah, I could too. What dorks.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Truck Balls

Memo to Redneck Men of America:

Why? No, really...I want to know. WHY?

There is nothing more disturbing than the sight of Truck Balls when I'm driving around town. And now thanks to California's new cell phone law, I can't even call a friend to share in my disgust and get some consolation from what can only be described as being "visually violated". They're saggy. They're veiny. They're nasty. They're plastic. And NOW, one can purchase them in every color of the rainbow. Well, SUPER. Upper crust white trash go the extra mile and buy shiny silver ones. You know, to keep it classy. Obviously. Are these disgusting things everywhere? Or are Californians the only lucky ones?

If one is in the unfortunate situation of finding themselves on a date with a guy that drives a "ball-mobile", they should run the other way, fake malaria, or announce your grandma died. But if one chooses to stick out the evening, the following are things that can be safely assumed about this individual:

-his truck is absolutely compensating for something he's lacking in his own manhood.

-this is NOT someone to introduce to Mom and Dad.

-they're probably praying that the South will rise again.

-Trucks with nuts are often accompanied by NASCAR stickers as additional decor.

-the big white sheet with two eye holes that's lying in the truck bed is NOT a Halloween costume.

-"Dressing up" to this guy is wearing his newly-Febreezed Glamis t-shirt, along with the jeans with the fewest holes. Sexy!

**It should be noted that the number of 'truck nuts' per capita rises sharply when driving through the 909. If you have small children, and live in that area, you might want to consider blacking out your car windows, thus avoiding the conversation with your kids that goes something like this:

Billy: "Mommy, what's hanging on that truck?"

Mom: "Oh. Uh, those are testicles. Where are your travel games, dear?"

Billy: "I dunno. You mean, they're like mine and daddy's?"

Mom: "Kind of...only those are not real. Are you SURE your Game Boy isn't back there??"

Billy: "Yup. And Mommy, they're blue. Why would a truck have blue testicles?"

I don't have kids, but PLEASE tell me how you'd explain a truck's blue balls with a straight face. And I think that's what bothers me the most about end up seeing them. LITTLE kids. They can't miss 'em...they're right at eye-level with the truck (or, ball-level, rather). And as parents try to explain why some people choose to be so vulgar, you can actually watch their young, pure minds lose a bit of their innocence. All because some tool in Fontana wanted his truck to be a little more testosterone-y.