"One, plus two, plus one, plus one..."

Corned beef and cabbage. I swear, only the Irish could pull off BOILING an entire meal in one pot, and lead people into believing it was a culinary treasure. Honestly...it's boiled. What is this? Oliver Twist? Can't our people come up with a signature dish a that's a little edgier? When I sit down to this meal, I feel like I'm noshing with Charlie Bucket and his family before he finds the golden ticket. It's just not a classy meal...but it's not supposed to be, I guess. And yet I scarf it down once a year...it wouldn't be St. Paddy's Day without it. There's something nostalgic about this meal...on that one day of the year, it's as natural as turkey on Thanksgiving. So, on St. Patrick's Day, you can usually find me drinking green beer in a bar after I've stuffed my face with a mean helping of corned beef and cabbage.

But not this year. No sir. On March 17, I will be heading down to the Arclight movie theatre in Hollywood for a screening of the movie Clue with my "movie night" friends. For those of you not familiar with the movie night tradition, a bunch of us crazies get together at one of our homes for a film of someone's choosing (we take turns in picking the movies we watch), and we usually choose a true cinematic masterwork. Past movies nights have included Clue, Troop Beverly Hills, Goonies, Reality Bites, The Jerk, Neverending Story, Transylvania 6-5000, The Pirate Movie, and Big Business, among several others. One of the unique things about our movie night group is that we dress up like characters from whatever movie we're watching that night, and if I do say so myself, we outdid ourselves on our Clue night. Below are a couple pictures from that evening, and we may just get decked out again for the Arclight. This is a big deal...I remember when I first watched this movie when I was in 4th grade. I was at my friend Trina Theel's house, and I absolutely adored it. I was sucked in. And the fact that I'll actually get to see it on the big screen is enough to make me betray my Irish heritage on that one sacred night of the year and spend my time in a movie theatre instead of a bar. For shame.

But you're batshit crazy if you think I won't be smuggling in blue food coloring to make my yellow beer turn green while I watch the movie. That's right...you can drink at these special screenings at the Arclight. Life is good.

Enjoy the pictures....

Me as Mrs. Peacock, Ro as Mrs. White. Perhaps we should name her Mrs. Brown instead....

Me as Mrs. Peacock. Note the feathers in my hair, and the fake cigarette...not to mention the totally bitchin' glasses. How could I not bust out this outfit again?! I just hope PETA doesn't dump red paint on me for wearing fur in public.

Scrabulous...FABULOUS.

Ok, another post that has nothing to do with dating. Deal. I'm on a dating hiatus this week (and last week...and the week before...but whatever.). Dating gets tiring...it's hard to go out with new people over and over, get purdy, and be charming and sociable when I really just want to be at home watching Friends re-runs. Sometimes I just need a break from it. I'm still writing to a couple of people from Match right now, so there may be some action next week. And when I say 'action', I'm talking about small talk regarding my favorite leisure activities over chamomile tea at the local Starbucks with someone I've only known online as hottboy6969. That was a joke...dudes with lame screen names like that don't get return emails from me. EVER. Listen up, gentlemen of Match.com:(and in some cases, I use the term 'gentlemen' very loosely), if you've stumbled across this blog today, please note that ANY respectable girl worth talking to does not want to chat with some creep on the internet whose screen name has the words sexy, sexxxy, player, horndog, or the number 69 anywhere in the title. Ew...you don't come off as sexy (or sexxxy, for that matter), you come off as creepy. CREEPY.

Well, look at that...apparently I DID have something to say about dating this week. Who knew I had it in me...I just start typing, and out it comes. But back to why I started today's post in the first place...Scrabulous. I've just discovered it on Facebook, and my sister has me hooked on it. It's great...you can play a game of Scrabble with anyone anywhere, as long as they're on Facebook. Now I'm a loyal Myspace girl, and I still don't get why Facebook is so great, because some of the stuff on that site downright confuses me. I don't get the purpose of adding the "puppy application", or the "lovebug application", or the "super-poke" application. Is standard poking not enough anymore? Now we have to super-poke? These kids today and their social networking sites. Why, when I was a girl, I had to walk (through the snow)to my friends houses in order to poke them...and usually they'd just be irritated with me for coming and poking them incessantly. Nowadays you just click a button, and poke someone without having to even be in the same time zone. I just don't see the point. But Scrabulous is great...it even has a dictionary, so you can play a word, and it TELLS you whether or not it's a word. No guess work, no flipping through dictionaries. It's all there for you. Sometimes I just put random tiles down, and hope it's a word. That's how I ended up playing the word "swale". I'd never heard of it...does anyone know what that means (without looking it up)? I bet Josh and/or Vicki know...these fools read textbooks for a living...their brains have lots of information stuffed in there. Am I right, guys? Do you know???? In any case, if anyone out there is on Facebook and would like for me to swale them at a swale game of Scrabulous, then let me know. We'll swale it up right nice, indeed.

Spread VD to everyone you know!

I can't get enough of Hoops and Yoyo...I just love their site. So of course I spent the last 20 minutes creating this Valentine's Day awesomeness.

Make a free ecard - it's easy!

Yeah, you're welcome.

BNL Cruise: Ships and Dip III

At long last, all of you in the blogosphere can settle down, because here are some pictures from the cruise. Enjoy....

Getting ready for the sexiest lifeboat drill ever.

The liquor was free for ONE hour during the cruise...we made the most of it.

At this point, every good gossip blog reader has seen the pictures online of my boyfriend, John Mayer on his cruise (SAME ship as us, just the cruise after ours...DAMMIT, barely missed him) jogging on deck of the ship in the Borat Swimsuit. (If you've been living under a rock and missed it, go here: http://perezhilton.com/2008-02-05-nicely-manscaped). Little does the rest of the world know that 5 days BEFORE John went out on deck in the neon green nightmare, Ed Robertson (lead singer of Barenaked Ladies) strutted out on stage in front of EVERYONE wearing only a speedo and a cowboy hat. Ed was a trendsetter, if you will:

Snorkeling in Grand Cayman (I'm the one with my arms up that looks like she's drowning). That's our ship, the Carnival Victory in the background.
A fully clothed Ed Robertson (speedo-man from up above) and I comparing bitchin' tattoos. I call this picture "tit for tat".

Some people thought this young lady and I were separated at birth. I'm sorry, we're not related. There's nothing bronze about me.
Does everyone else see something MUCH dirtier than a sealion in this evening's towel animal? Just checking...nah, I didn't either. I wanted to see if YOU did.

If you still can't get enough, there are more pictures of the trip on my Myspace page....

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=16462957

The worst "vacation hangover" ever....

Poor Jen. She has such a hard life. She just spent 5 days on a cruise through the Caribbean, going to concerts and visiting exotic ports of call. Wah.

I realize how ridiculous that sounds. But coming home from vacation sucks. I spent all my waking hours listening to music and eating, two of my favorite things. Then I'm supposed to come back to the real world and be RESPONSIBLE again??? Add that to the fact that I'm knocked down by the flu as soon as I get home, and have no more days off saved up at work. But things could be worse, and I tried to remind myself of that fact whilst I hacked up a lung on the couch for much of the week since returning. So here's a list of things that are my 'silver lining' while I'm sick:

1. The flu waited to hit until I got home...nothing worse than being sick on vacation, much less on a ship or an airplane.

2. I happened to be at my parents' house when the Jamaican voodoo flu hit. So I just stayed there. Their heater works better than the crap one at my freezing apartment.

3. Mom made me chicken noodle soup with matzo balls. Nothing like some good Jew-food from your Catholic mother.

4. I got to watch Ellen during the day, which I never get to do.

5. Phlegm is sexy.

6. People bring stuff to you when you're sick...much like on the cruise. It was nice to be waited on...a smooth transition back into regular life.

7. I wore slippers all day.

8. I was able to take care of car repair stuff since I wasn't at work all day. Got myself a bitchin' rental...I'm driving around a big ol' Jeep. Actually it's a midget-Jeep, but it feels big. It looks like a Jeep Cherokee whose growth was stunted at childhood. It drives pretty nicely, but I'm anxious to get my car back. Here's what it looks like, only mine is white. Like me. :)

And while we're on the subject of my car, it's in the body shop being fixed as we speak...my baby was banged up pretty badly. It needs over $7000 in work done...quite a lot for a car that was hit while sitting in a driveway, minding it's own darn business. But I'm thankful that it's not totalled, or I'd be without a car completely. So yay. In 2 1/2 weeks I should be full of farfegneugen again.

I know the main intent of this blog is to talk about my dating adventures, but there haven't been any lately...I promise I'm not keeping anything from my loyal reader(s)! I'd crossed my fingers that I'd meet a fabulous fellow on the cruise, but no dice. Lots of couples everywhere, which gets a little depressing sometimes, but I try not to let that get to me. There's nothing more pathetic than the bitter single girl, and I refuse to become that. Right now, there's one guy (let's call him Moe) from Match I'm talking to that insists on texting me instead of calling me (you all can guess how thrilled I am with that if you've read by post on texting). Moe and I went out once, had a pretty good time, but I wonder how much of that was the liquor, and how much of it was me actually enjoying his company. The Four Man Plan (4MP) says every guy gets 2 dates, no matter what. The only exception is if you have reason to think he's an axe murderer, then you can peace the fool out before the 2nd date. And since I don't think Moe has a lengthy rap sheet, he gets a second date.

Stay tuned...now that I'm home (and healthy again), I'll be back to posting a little more regularly. I'll also post some pictures from the cruise later tonight. I've been writing this post from work (it's 3:30 on Friday, what do you want from me? Productivity?!), and all my pictures are on my computer at home.