Cars get dirty. It happens. Whether it’s road dust, pollution, bird poo, tree sap, bugs, midgets, or any number of other things that fly towards our cars while we’re careening down the freeway at an accelerated speed, it’s inevitable that our cars will get dirty, no matter how awesome a wax job we might have.
I KNOW this has happened to everyone out there, because there’s no way that this happened this many times to me without it being a universal experience. Scenario:You’re on the freeway at full speed, driving behind some fool who decides that THIS is the best time to slough off the crap on their windshield. They blindly hit the ol’ washer fluid button about 13 times, and the wipers start going, spraying fluid all over the windshield, until their windshield is pristine. What these driving Neanderthals may not realize is that when they’re driving that fast, the wind sprays EVERY car in their vicinity, flinging their washer fluid and window funk everywhere. And here’s a news flash, Captain Courteous Driver. We’re not grateful for the free ‘car wash’ you’re giving us. We’re just annoyed that your nastiness is now being cast all over our clean cars. Thanks. No really…thanks. And don’t try to get out of “No Washer Fluid on the Freeway” rule with the argument of an ostrich or emu laying the ultimate deuce square on your windshield, because those suckers don’t fly. My momma didn’t raise no fool. Please.
Living in Los Angeles, driving is a way of life. It’s unavoidable. The one part of our car that needs to be clean while we’re driving is our windshield. I get that. Just don’t do it on the freeway. Do it at home. At the gas station. Parked in a lot. Driving down the street when there’s no one behind you. It was probably dirty before you got in the car and started driving. C’mon, people. Think ahead.
Ahhhhhhhhh. It's good to be back.