It seems to be quite challenging for you men to pee standing up. Case in point: I coordinated a wedding tonight, and at the end of the evening, I made my rounds throughout the many rooms of the villa to make sure everything is put away, picked up, and turned off. Without fail, what meets me EVERY TIME in the men's room after a 12 hour workday is the overwhelming stench of the urine of 78 strange men. On the toilet seat. On the floor. And if I'm lucky, it's on the wall too. It's just delightful. It's my favorite. Now I get that they've been to a wedding and had a few drinks, but is their aim (and judgement) THAT bad?
Question: What's so bad about peeing sitting down? Especially when you're drunk. Is it a question of masculinity? You know, it's ok. No one has to know. Try it. If it helps, take the sports section in there with you. Just treat it like you would a deuce, and SIT DOWN.
Please consider this. For my sake.